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I want to die

Every day the tinnitus gets a little worse and I seriously don’t want to go on anymore. Ever since Joe and I got together we’ve worked hard to save our money so we could enjoy our retirement, and now I can’t see that ever happening. I’m so jealous of people who have properly functioning ears. People who don’t have pain all the time.

I can’t even figure out what’s really causing all these symptoms so how am I ever going to get better? It all seems so hopeless and I’ve never been so anxious and depressed in all my life. I keep praying for miracle or just SOME improvement, ANY improvement, to give me hope, but it has yet to come. If not for the body pain I would just sleep 24/7 to escape the hell I’m living in.

All my life I’ve feared dying. I didn’t realize there were worse things than death.

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  1. Erin
    February 3rd, 2020 at 03:23 | #1

    I feel so awful you are going through this. I am keeping you in my thoughts.