{"id":516,"date":"2004-06-08T17:47:13","date_gmt":"2004-06-09T00:47:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/nicole.sleepyfroggie.net\/blog\/?p=516"},"modified":"2008-07-12T18:26:05","modified_gmt":"2008-07-12T23:26:05","slug":"dont-let-the-doorknob-hit-you-in-the-ass","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nicole.sleepyfroggie.net\/blog\/?p=516","title":{"rendered":"Don&#8217;t let the doorknob hit you in the ass"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Well the time has come &#8211; my upstairs neighbors are moving out this week. Finally! I noticed that they rented a van to move stuff, so the house they had built must be nearby. This morning I saw the woman pulling the van out of the parking lot with her husband driving one of the cars behind her. Hmmm &#8230; I wonder who wears the pants in that relationship. The guy is small, stomps around like a giant, talks too damn loud (sometimes I can hear him, but never her), yet he can&#8217;t drive a van? LOSER!<\/p>\n<p>Yes, I know I&#8217;m passing judgment on the guy, but guess what? I don&#8217;t care!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Well the time has come &#8211; my upstairs neighbors are moving out this week. Finally! I noticed that they rented a van to move stuff, so the house they had built must be nearby. This morning I saw the woman pulling the van out of the parking lot with her husband driving one of the cars behind her. Hmmm &#8230; I wonder who wears the pants in that relationship. The guy is small, stomps around like a giant, talks too damn loud (sometimes I can hear him, but never her), yet he can&#8217;t drive a van? LOSER! Yes, I know I&#8217;m passing judgment on the guy, but guess what? I don&#8217;t care!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,25],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-516","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-house-home","category-neighborhood"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/nicole.sleepyfroggie.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/516"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/nicole.sleepyfroggie.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/nicole.sleepyfroggie.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nicole.sleepyfroggie.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nicole.sleepyfroggie.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=516"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/nicole.sleepyfroggie.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/516\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/nicole.sleepyfroggie.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=516"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nicole.sleepyfroggie.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=516"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nicole.sleepyfroggie.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=516"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}